Okay, okay, I was just joking about that stuff up there. If you believed that shit you're pretty dumb. I'm not a woman! HA. "Why'd you do it Glenn?" you ask. Well guys, I just wanted to have a little fun before we move on to the much anticipated second part of my journal series, "Back to the Basics: Glenn's book scanned on a computer then explained".
The left side of this image is actually pretty boring unless you imagine that it's JRR Tolkien's book of ideas and you realize that he was actually fairly goofy considering he wrote such serious and beautiful books about tree men and elf dudes. The first idea is about an old man who still goes to see his son play baseball, but it's like beer league softball and the guy is embarrassed. This idea actually got turned into a sketch by fellow group member Brendan and I think it went well. The second idea also got turned into a sketch by me, but I don't think people got it, even though I still stand by it. One day I started thinking about bombs in movies and I thought it was dumb that the people who set the bomb put a timer on it because then they let the guy who's cutting the wires know exactly how much time he has. It'd be a way better idea for the bad guy to do it like this:
(talking on a phone)
Bad Guy - Listen up police chief, I've put a big bomb in the world's busiest library on Main Street. Leave 6 million dollars in the garbage can on Hot Street ASAP or the bomb blows up eventually. No funny stuff
Chief - How much time do we have until the bomb goes off?
Bad Guy - I'm not telling, just give me the money. You'd better do it fast. The bomb might blow up like in ten minutes you know?
(hangs up)
Chief - SHIT. Get this guy his money. In the meantime, go to the library and see if there's a timer on that bomb. There usually is.
Bill - Chief, there's no timer!
Chief - Oh man
See? No timer means big time results. In retrospect, I should have just written it as I did above, but instead I had two criminals arguing about whether or not to put a timer on. But whatever, who cares right?
The main event of this image is the right side of the page. It was drawn a couple years ago when my friend Jon got a job at the Ontario College of Art and Design as a nude model. We thought it'd be funny if he practiced posing (because it's really tough to hold a pose apparently) and I tried drawing, but don't worry, he didn't get nude or anything. If anything, this really shows how bad I am at drawing. I'm probably the worst drawer I've ever known, no exaggeration. I stink so bad at drawing. I can't even draw a person really. My specialty is cats from a side view and I can do 3-d boxes and skulls.
Now if you'll excuse me I have to go home to see my real mom. When I was a kid, my gum of choice was Bubbleicious. Remember the ill-fated flavour "Chocolate Strawberry"? Yeah no one seems to. It was my favourite. So get me some for Mother's Day. Remember Gatorade Gum? Hardest chewing gum in town.
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