IN THE OLD DAYS "HOTMAIL" WAS LETTERS WITH SWEAR WORDS

It's been a whole week since we last rapped and so much has changed!

- haircut
- sun tan
- new jacket
- new shirt (Pierre Cardin)
- bruised (broken?) toe
- dead George Steinbrenner
- Global Reality Channel premiers

In this new world I suggest we join hands and make peace by playing more board games, the most underrated form of entertainment, not only in the new world, but in last week's world where I had longer hair.

Speaking of board games... wait, hold on, that would be a great name for my snowboard jam fest next year. Written down. This year's Ice Marshall is none other than Batman, a local realtor who likes to be called Batman (real name is Doug I believe).

G20: The Board Game: Toronto Edition HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA, right? Oh.

Speaking of board games, my friend Andy bought an old WWF (the wrestling federation, not the ape school) at a Valoo Village while we were in SARNIA on the weekend. Why did we go to the town that "Vacation Magazine" dubbed "not worth going to"? Because Liv lived there before living here to make a living living live with me. Her dad has a beachfront property and we Sea-Doo'd, tu-tubed, ate and then poo-pooed for four days straight (on and off).

We also saw shock rockers "RUSH" play at Sarnia's Bayfest. The highlight was observing local teens fighting and kissing while very drunk and stoned all set to favourites like "Tom Sawyer" and "Subdivisions".

Liv sits on her old man's Sea-Doo. OR "I see, then I do"?

When I got back to work yesterday I was more bummed than Ice-T's girl friend, the voluptuous Coco. To make matters worse, I was on my way to our writing attic when the police apprehended me for cruising through a red light on my bike. I tried to weasel my way out of a ticket by saying "I'm not gay, but you're all attractive and I think your work during G20 was pure ballet." It didn't work, but the guy ended up giving me a break and ticketing me for not having a light which will run me $35 opposed to the alleged $350 for showing the traffic light that I don't obey robots.