The bad news didn't thwart Burlington's the Green family from enjoying a post-festival beer and dog roast in Parking Lot R West.The autumn holiday season officially comes to a close following a wild Remembrance Day, setting the stage for ultimate human holiday, and worldwide consumer phenomenon, Christmas. Do you think that if science somehow proved Jesus didn't exist that Christmas would be canceled? I think they'd probably just change the name or maybe find another person who was born that day and name it after them instead -- options include Jimmy Buffet, Alannah Myles, Annie Lennox, Sissy Spacek, Shane MacGowan, Dido and Swiss-born American dairy educator Otto Frederick Hunziker. That's very reassuring.
But it's never going to happen. Even if people were to prove that Jesus wasn't a magician, they won't be able to disprove that he was a solid guy who was nice to everyone and who died for everyone, even the assholes.
"Jesus, we're all pretty shitty, but you still like us just fine, what's the big deal?"
"I don't know, I just like all you guys."
"I'm a bad guy Jesus! I coveted my neighbour's wife Janice , I ate way too many berries yesterday and I stole a clay pot just because I was bored."
"Brutal Dan, just brutal. But don't worry, I forgive you man. I'm going to the garden to meet up with Judas for a bit."
"Oh, cool. I like that guy except for his haircut and his sandals."
"Yeah totally agree on the sandals. I like his haircut because it's daring."
"Fair ball Jesus."
Before I dig myself a really deep, uninformed religious hole here, I'd like to pass on this related story. I bet the real reason for this decision is the Vatican wants to make sure they're pro-alien in case an invasion happens. "Check out Earth's news alien king! We supported you and now we worship you. With our combined power and influence, we can rule the galaxy together as one. Let's call our team The Red Robots because you guys are futuristic and red is a popular Earth colour" - the Pope. Little does the Pope know that aliens will find more in common with the creatures of Earth's vast oceans, and will sink our landmasses creating an aqua kingdom with dolphin guards and sharks that wear turtles for helmets.
But it's never going to happen. Even if people were to prove that Jesus wasn't a magician, they won't be able to disprove that he was a solid guy who was nice to everyone and who died for everyone, even the assholes.
"Jesus, we're all pretty shitty, but you still like us just fine, what's the big deal?"
"I don't know, I just like all you guys."
"I'm a bad guy Jesus! I coveted my neighbour's wife Janice , I ate way too many berries yesterday and I stole a clay pot just because I was bored."
"Brutal Dan, just brutal. But don't worry, I forgive you man. I'm going to the garden to meet up with Judas for a bit."
"Oh, cool. I like that guy except for his haircut and his sandals."
"Yeah totally agree on the sandals. I like his haircut because it's daring."
"Fair ball Jesus."
Before I dig myself a really deep, uninformed religious hole here, I'd like to pass on this related story. I bet the real reason for this decision is the Vatican wants to make sure they're pro-alien in case an invasion happens. "Check out Earth's news alien king! We supported you and now we worship you. With our combined power and influence, we can rule the galaxy together as one. Let's call our team The Red Robots because you guys are futuristic and red is a popular Earth colour" - the Pope. Little does the Pope know that aliens will find more in common with the creatures of Earth's vast oceans, and will sink our landmasses creating an aqua kingdom with dolphin guards and sharks that wear turtles for helmets.
NEW LINKS ADDED
Check out Marmalade Comics, Jon Blair, and Inessa Frantowski, for comics about a cool dog, a blog by a cool dogg and a website by Inessa, who has probably petted a dog, I don't know for sure.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment