I COME IN PEACE AND IN VINTAGE DIOR

Whoa dollies, we bought so much post-Halloween discount candy that my new name should be "The Honey Bear". The mainstream media always associates Santa Claus with toys, but don't forget, the guy fills stockings with candy as well. So you can call me Santa Claus too. ORRR...

The Pezident of the United Treats of Sugar
The TerMINTator
Kyle Reece's Pieces
The Crash Test Gummy
John Candy
Caramilk DioGuardelcious
And...



My favourite Aqua song just in time for Remembrance Day. The only difference is that this is only the beginning, not the end, for me, the sweet sugar candyman.

For all you history buffs, here are some bonus Halloween photos for your scrapbooks. Look at that jersey. PERFECT. I'm giving myself the chills just looking at and I'm not even cold because I'm wearing thick ass corduroy, which I think will be one of the first textiles to go extinct.

On Sunday I performed with LIFE OF A CRAPHEAD, and to thank me for doing it Jon brought me some meat last night. This isn't the first time I've received meat as a gift. One Christmas my dad got me a box of steaks and at first I was like "unconventional", which quickly turned into "great gift", because lets face it folks, meat is expensive and I'm not made of dimes. I cooked Jon's tenderloin to perfection and had some fried onions along with it that were absolutely drenched in butter. For desert I had candy. My snack today was candy. My desert and late night snack will be candy.