LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY PANTS

I don't know what's up in your corner of the crust, but around here in Toronto it's been raining cats and dogs and water for a week straight. Even though most us of spend 98% of the day in a dry room filled with screens, our ancestors have passed onto us a feeling of gloom whenever the weather starts acting like I banged its wife. No, wait, that doesn't make sense -- our ancestors loved rain because it fed their crops, their babies and their belief that God can piss/cry. Maybe we can all just blame it on whoever wrote that song "Sunny Days". Was it Lighthouse? Blame it on Lighthouse.

I could've spent this last rainy week on a couch wrapped in blankets and freshly washed Nautica brand sleepwear (I did). But instead I was working alongside the talented team at Marf Interactive on my new iPhone app (I didn't). The new app features beautiful graphics, a user-friendly interface and first and foremost -- a whole lotta fun. It costs $29.99. Here's some of the outrageous features we developed:

The 6th edition of the Trivial Pursuit: Glenn that includes some brand new 2010 questions. As loyal readers of this blog, here is a bonus answer to probably the hardest question in the game:

Q: What's Glenn's password for everything?
A: JRRTOLKIEN

There's also a fun photo game called "Pickle Man" where you match a picture of my face with the pickle of your choosing giving me a pickle mustache, just like in the movies. This guy sorta looks like me so it will give you a good idea of what the app can do. The only difference is that the picture below features a pickle spear, while my app, at $29.99, will offer no less than full pickles.


Speaking of sorta looking like me, the app has a fun "Celebrity Chemistry" game, where you can upload a picture of your face and it'll tell you the precise mixture of celebrities you look like. You have to pay extra to use your own picture. Since mine is included in the price of the app and because I love everyone in this world more than the world loves everyone, here is my celebrity chemistry:





You'll also have access to my full stats:

Most frequented bathroom in the world? Parent's house, upstairs
Number of times eaten at Arby's? 3

Since the above are fairly well known stats they won't be included in the actual app. When you purchase the full version you'll have access to "Number of Dreams about New Shoes" and "Thoughts about aliens per hour".

In conclusion, I dare you to ask for a birthday cake for Christmas.