MY BABIES AREN'T GOOD

I was talking with my mom a couple of days ago, and the subject of ADD and ADHD came up for some reason. That same night my cousin who's 2 or 3 whizzed on the floor. But back to the ADD. Either I have ADD or ADHD, or I'm just really impatient. I can't complete a task unless it's very interesting, or if I get on a role while trying to complete it. I can finish a book no problem, but back in University, I barely ever read an entire assigned reading because they were simply too boring. This blog is a shining example of my inability to sit still. Here's a typical thought process:

1) Alright dude, time to write on that Internet site you do

2) What should I talk about? How about my trip to the Fall Fair

3) Okay yeah. Fall Fair. I saw my friend Harry, ate 5 candy apples, saw a ghost, won a Smurf and stole some raspberry delights. Now all I have to do is write about it.

4) Fall Fair blah blah, this isn't very interesting, let's talk about poo.

In fact, point number four pretty much sums up my sense of humour. Perhaps I'll make it my new motto. Do people have mottos anymore? "Motto"... that'd be a good name for a tough guy in a wussy play. A play about a girl who moves to a small town where she gets a job at an exotic pet store frequented by a gang of greasers (because they like snakes and lizards). Their leader named Motto Manzini tries repeatedly to get the girl to join the Python Pack (his gang). Then the son of the owner of the pet store comes back to town after spending the last four years in Hong Kong because he got a karate scholarship and well, the rest writes itself.

Did you click on that "son" link? Holy cow that's gross. If my wife took a picture of me holding up my new kid in that state I'd probably yell at her. It's like if you had a dirty old dog and you knew he was going to die soon, but instead of taking pictures of it alive and chasing balls, you take pictures of its corpse lying near the shed. Is it like that? I think it is, but like reversed. You know what I mean though right? All they needed to do to make that picture suitable would be to do one of two things: Either wrap that thing in a blanket or simply wipe all that shit off. MAN. That bun is right out of the oven. Are doctors even allowed to let you hold a baby that fresh? I don't think they are. Even if they are, would you want to? He's not even wearing gloves! Then again, I know as much about child birth as I do about Cricket, so I may be way off.

What are you going to be for Halloween? Last year I was a cat, so this year I think I might try to go as a chef.

Thanks a lot for paying attention today. In conclusion, let's go for peanuts tomorrow night instead of golf. Remember we talked about that? YEAH