I apologize to those who stayed up all night waiting for the final part of the Jason Priestley interview, but his publicist called me and ordered me not to print it because he really slams Stephen Harper and they didn't want it to get out. Since I'm loyal to my readers and wish to uphold my status as a member of the fourth estate, here's a brief excerpt:
WIDAHIA: Now Jason, we've talked extensively about Euclidian geometry, the internal combustion engine and you're brief stint as a total dreamboat, so I thought we've move into political territory. Do you ever see yourself running for office?
JP: I'd be lying if I said I've never considered it. Politics is very big in my life. If not for local legislation in the small town in Kentucky where I have my farm, I would've never been able to plant the peach trees to make my famous "Priestley and Sons Kentucky Country Preserves" It made me realize how important public service really is.
WIDAHIA: I didn't know you made preserves.
JP: I don't.
WIDAHIA: Huh?
JP: Back to politics Bill.
WIDAHIA: Glenn.
JP: I haven't lived in Canada since I was a teen of fifteen, but I follow the news closely. Stephen Harper is a booger lipped vampire. Is there any more Kool-Aid in that jug?
WIDAHIA: This is water and yes, there's more of it.
JP: Clear is my favourite Kool-Aid flavour. I invented it.
WIDAHIA: Oh yeah? What else did you invent?
JP: Music.
WIDAHIA: Alright, I'm outta here.
MMMMMM satisfying. Let's move on.
THING THAT'S GOOD BUT ALSO BAD OF THE DAY
Who here buys deli meat? When you buy it from a place that slices themselves they usually put it in a resealable bag and you're like, "That's great. Seal in the freshness. All provided. I'm happy today". Then you get home and make a sandwich and everything's fine until you try to re-seal the package they provided. AND IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO CLOSE! The worst Ziplock style bags you'll ever use. It's more frustration than it's worth. So here's my plea to deli's: We really appreciate the bags but they're the worst and make me want to slam my fist through something soft that'll still make a loud noise so that it seems like I'm more angry than I probably am. There. Case closed. Next case is Mattel vs. Tonka.
I'm more of a Mattel man. Sleek, stylish. Tonka is too tough for me. 'Mattel Tonka' would be a good alias to go by if you ever get famous and want to anonomously check into a hotel. At the same time it would make a really stupid band name. Do you think Tonka and Mattel hate each other? They both fight for the dreams of little boys everywhere.
"I KNOW WHAT BOYS WANT!"
"NO! I KNOW WHAT BOYS WANT!"
That's them fighting at a conference.
See you tomorrow!
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