December 17, 2008


At some point in my life my friend Andy and I made a harmless, fake Mats Sundin MySpace page because there wasn't one already. We tried to make it as real as possible and it eventually even made it onto the news. Once the cat was officially out of the sack, we made it very clear on the page that it wasn't really Mats but it's funny to imagine that it is. Well, two years (or something I don't remember) later, people (children and middle-aged) still send messages thinking that Mats will respond. I don't check it that often, but I did yesterday and received a really good one:

I recently purchased a Porsche Cayenne turbo,black/black 80k with 20" sport designs and a colleague at The Auto Forum informed me this was your vehicle for a time.Can you confirm or deny this? Sorry to say I'm not into hockey but my girlfriends father is a Huge Fan and this could buy me serious Goodie points with him.Petty I know but You see I am madly in love with his daughter and I am meeting him for the first time tomorrow with the intention of asking for his blessing to marry Her. I need all the help I can get... Thank-you for your time.Stay frosty.

Seriously? It's like that Seinfeld episode with Jon Voight's LeBaron. Usually we don't respond to these because it's mean to lead people into thinking that they're talking to Mats, but if you didn't take the time to read that it's blatantly fake or you aren't smart enough to realize that there's no way Mats would make himself so public, then you kind of deserve it. So I wrote back:

I can't tell you for sure, but I definitely owned a wicked Cayenne and that sounds fairly similar. No guarantees. You shouldn't need the car to impress her old man. Just be yourself. That's how I bagged my wife. Don't worry about hockey. You have a Porsche so you must be successful. Rock the party

I tried to help him! I got another one that said this:

Ok, I know you like hockey but I also know you LOVE fishing. I'm a fishing guide here in beautiful BC home of the FANTASTIC Vancouver Canucks. If you sign with Vancouver I will take you fishing any time you want. Check out my website for some great pics and info

To which I responded:

WE'll see. Still weighing the options. Nice fish

(His profile pic had a big fish)

I think if Mats signs with Vancouver I'll send him another message. Today I tried to start an Internet rumour by saying in Mats' status: "Mats is wondering how the ribs are in St.Louis" then I put his mood as ecstatic. So if you hear a rumour about Mats playing in St. Louis you can thank and gullible morons everywhere. I'll keep you all updated on the above conversations because I know this story has you on the edge of your damn seat.

I don't know how to get rid of the box below. It's nothing. Ignore it. It looks kind of cool though right?

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